Llevo seis meses tomando antidepresivos.
Do they help? Most days. However, lately I have been experiencing anxiety attacks. Kinda like that time I thought I almost died in a plane... (that's a story for another day).
Como se sienten los ataques de panico? (Estoy buscando el signo de pregunta que abre, pero en este teclado Americano no crea que exista), un ataque de panico se siente exactamente (para mi) como lo que suena: Estas en una cocina pelando tomates a media luz, escuchando a Kenny G y depronto alguien salta por tu espalda y te hace cagar del susto...
Excepto que no te puedes calmar, entiendes lo que esta sucediendo pero no sabes como calmarte.
La unica solucion que yo he encontrado es salir a caminar, alejarme de la situacion, enfocarme en algo verde: sean arboles o pasto, sean flores o nubes o pulgas.
ALGO.
I am learning to identify my triggers and that is the hardest part. Anything service or suicide related sets me off into panic, I feel like I can't breathe and all I wanna do is cry, scream, throw rocks at a building, then hide my head in the ground like an ostrich.
Why me? Who knows but I have heard enough ministers say that this is never a smart question to ask. Naturally, I am starting to believe them.
I wish someone knew the secret: Maybe the answer lies deep inside of me and I am too distracted gardening and planning how to rehab my yard to pay attention.
...gardening calms my mind and that's all I know for now.
Also: Coffee doesn't help. Maybe I should lay down the Starbees...
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